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Similarities (Bones Fic)

Title:  Similarities
Author: [info]shirleyann66
Characters: Booth, Zach, mention of others
Fandom: Bones
Rating: PG 
Warnings :   Spoilers mainly for The Hero in the Hold, and The Pain in the Heart .
DisClaimer: I do not own nor am I affiliated with Bones or Fox or any of the other PTB in relation to the show...although I wouldn't mind playing with Booth for awhile...No infringement is intended. I'm just taking the characters out to play, and will do my best to show them a very, VERY good time. ;)  
A/N1:  Unbeta'd; all mistakes are mine.

 

A/N2:  This is not intended to be slash/pre-slash, but reading it again I suppose you can interpret it that way if you want.  :D

A/N3:  I've only seen Hero in the Hold once, so I probably have the quote wrong - but I think the sentiment is accurate.  Oh, and I've never written in the second (?) person before but it was what really got the fic flowing smoothly from my head to the paper/screen.  My apologies if the grammar/verb tenses don't quite match up...  :D

--------------------------------------------


Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

You stare through the windshield and listen to the tick of the engine as it cools. The building in front of you looks cold...intimidating.


 

You think of captivity, of fear and the taste of desperation in the back of your throat.  You think of Teddy Parker, of ghosts and guilt and grief. You think of forgiveness and help received from beyond – you know Teddy was there, no matter what Bones believes.


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

Until you talked to Teddy again, you hadn't acknowledged the similarities – not consciously. You can't help but marvel at them now. Similar features, similar voice patterns, similar air of stunned innocence (sorry, Teddy), similar moments of shining hero worship that – with Teddy – made you preen. With Zach it only made you squirm with discomfort and guilt and – yes. Fear. The last boy who looked at you like that ended up slung over your back (already dead) as you made your way to the rendezvous point. All because you didn't look out for him the way you were supposed to.


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

You'd wanted to say no, you always told people you loved them. But you couldn't lie to a ghost. There was one off the top of your head – and sadly, another one you never even showed you loved, except by not showing it.


 

You didn't want another stunned innocent lying dead in your arms.


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

You thought of Bones first, of course. She's never far from your thoughts in any situation. But looking at Teddy, recognizing the similarities, it wasn't Bones you felt the most regret about. Bones is still here, beside you, in front of you, whole and as happy as you can make her. You know, deep inside, that someday the time will be right for both of you, and then you'll tell her.


 

Someday.


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

You had wanted to keep Zach at a distance; to protect him from the danger that came with the hero worship of Seeley Booth. You'd had your protege, your sidekick, and you'd let him die. It wasn't until you talked to Teddy again that you acknowledged the truth.


 

Just as there are different kinds of love, there are different ways for the kid beside you to lose their life.


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

Yes. Of course.


 

You take a deep breath and open the door. You lock the truck then turn and look at the building. Unlike all the others, you've never been here. You haven't seen him since you dropped him off with Sweets outside this very building. You stare at it. The structure is cold, forbidding, ominous.


 

You told him to keep his head down – you should have told Zach, too. But each time Zach looked at you with that little bit of hero worship, all you could remember was Teddy (how heavy he was, how his blood seemed to burn your hands and your back, how you thought you'd never make it back, how you almost wished you never would) and you'd turn away.


 

You named your boy to honour the one you failed. The other boy you failed is still here, in this world, even if he's never truly been of it. You can't give him back the life he's lost but maybe...maybe you can help him build another one, one where he won't feel so alone he falls prey to any monster who can twist logic until his innocent soul can't see the insanity of what he's doing (there's still a part of you that doesn't believe it – not Zach).


 

Haven't you ever loved somebody and never told them?”


 

You shake your head, then square your shoulders and stride purposefully towards the building and the lost boy inside it.


 

Maybe you'll never tell him you love him.


 

But maybe it's time to show him.
 

 


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Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
onceiwasaturtle
Jul. 31st, 2010 06:07 pm (UTC)
That's lovely!
shirleyann66
Aug. 2nd, 2010 02:16 pm (UTC)
Awww, thank you! ^.^
melissasdavid
Aug. 1st, 2010 02:07 am (UTC)
Hi.... I LIKED this. Alot, actually.

Ah, Booth. and Zach.

and angst and love and regret.

This was a great piece.
shirleyann66
Aug. 2nd, 2010 02:20 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much!!

It's been kicking around in my head ever since I saw Hero in the Hold. And IMO the show didn't really address Booth's feelings about what Zach had done (or about Zach himself, really).

I'm so glad you liked it! :)

buffyangellvr23
Aug. 1st, 2010 03:36 am (UTC)
nice work :)
shirleyann66
Aug. 2nd, 2010 02:20 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :) I'm glad you liked it.

Edited at 2010-08-02 02:22 pm (UTC)
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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"All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need...fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little --"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

-- Susan and Death in Hogfather by Terry Pratchett

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"And no practical definition of freedom would be complete without the freedom to take the consequences. Indeed, it is the freedom upon which all the others are based."

-- Lord Vetinari in Going Postal by Terry Pratchett

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They thought the Library was a dangerous place because of all the magical books, which was true enough, but what made it really one of the most dangerous places there could ever be was the simple fact that it was a library.

-- Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett

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As a wizard, it was something that Ponder had only before encountered in acorns: a tiny soundless voice which said, yes, I am but a small, green, simple object - but I dream about forests.

-- Interesting Times by Terry Pratchett

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In the 24th century, there will be no hunger. There will be no greed. And every child will know how to read.

-- Gene Roddenberry, as repeated by Jonathan Frakes in the documentary How William Shatner Changed the World

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We've got two lives, one we're given and the other one we make
And the world won't stop, and actions speak louder
Listen to your heart, and what your heart might say
Everything we got, we got the hard way.

-- Mary Chapin Carpenter, The Hard Way from the album Come On, Come On

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Cause when they own the information, oh
They can bend it all they want.

-- John Mayer, Waiting on the World to Change from the album Continuum

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Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, "I'll try again tomorrow."

-- Mary Anne Radmacher, as seen in Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Tales to Inspire

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I never loved the soldier
Until there was a war.
Or thought about tomorrow
'til my baby hit the floor.
I only talk to God
When somebody's about to die.
I never cherished freedom
Freedom never cries.

-- Five for Fighting, Freedom Never Cries from the album Two Lights

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It may sound absurd: but don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed: but won't you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream

-- Five for Fighting, Superman (It's Not Easy) from the album American Town

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Had a dream last night took a time travellin' ride
Back to my childhood where those monsters reside
They snack on innocence and dine on self-esteem
But I like to be in touch with what makes me scream
Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost
These are the things that terrify me the most.
No alien, psychopath or MTV host
Scares me like vampires,mummies and the Holy Ghost.

-- Jimmy Buffett, Vampires, Mummies and the Holy Ghost from the album Fruitcakes

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"I want to believe that... the dead are not lost to us. That they speak to us... as part of something greater than us - greater than any alien force. And if you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen, to what's speaking, it can give us the power to save ourselves."

-- Fox Mulder, The X-Files from the episode The Truth, pt. 2
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