?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Promises (or lack thereof) - Pt. 18/25

Challenge:  love_bingo   
Rating:  PG to PG-13
Words:  513
Prompt:  LN2 - Unbreak My Heart
Warnings:  Nothing too explicit but will warn for violence/implied torture in a couple of the later parts (I'll post a specific warning on those posts). Everything in the series and comics is fair game, so spoilers ahoy!  

Disclaimer:   I do not own, nor am I affiliated with, CBS or Jericho or...whoever else may actually own this show.  I just like to take the characters out to play.  I put them back, mostly unharmed...although not always...this is for fun, not profit and no copyright infringement is intended.

--------------------------- 

Beck knew Heather sometimes doubted the depth of his feelings for her. He knew that sometimes his need to remember his lost family lasted a little too long, and when it did, Heather's faith would waver slightly.

Those were the times he wished he was a more romantic man. More articulate, more...something. Because he didn't know how to tell her what he felt. He didn't know how to tell her what her love and quiet belief in him meant to him.

Although he never said the words - how could he, when he still couldn't make her any promises? - he tried to show her at every opportunity how much she meant to him.

She didn't doubt him often - only when she thought his memories of his life Before were overwhelming him.

And sometimes they did. Sometimes the memory of a beautiful brown-eyed woman, and a sweet little girl would hit him like a sledgehammer in the stomach, and he would have to ride the wave of pain until it subsided. Sometimes the rage at not knowing what happened to them was difficult to control or bear.

He knew those times made Heather wonder, made her worry, sometimes hurt her - he could see it all in her eyes.

He didn't know how to tell her or show her the depth of what he felt for her. The words of pleasure he breathed against her heated skin as they made love were a pale expression of the passion he felt for her. His good-bye kiss in the morning didn't come close to expressing how important it was to him to know she was waiting for him, or that she was coming home to him. The soothing talks at the end of day didn't come close to showing how much he respected her intelligence and depended on her to keep him grounded and to sometimes give him much needed perspective.

He didn't know how to tell her that her fierceness, her stubbornness, her geekiness, her good soul, her faith and hope that they could survive and solve any problem was what helped him through. Long before they'd ever made love, it had been her quiet belief in him, her certainty that he was a good man, trying to do the right thing that had bolstered his will to go on; given him the strength to face his doubts about the ASA and trust his instincts that something wasn't right. 

He didn't know how to tell her that knowing she loved him had given him his heart back. Maybe it was more scarred than before, and maybe there was a part of it that would always love a woman and a child who were gone - but he didn't love Heather less - he loved her differently

She'd soothed him, healed him, loved him when she'd had no reason to ever trust him again. She'd brought him out of the worst of his grief and back to the land of the living just by being herself.

He just wished, sometimes, that he knew how to tell her.



Part 17          Part 19



 

Profile

shirleyann66
shirleyann66

Latest Month

January 2015
S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

Quotes

"All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need...fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little --"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

-- Susan and Death in Hogfather by Terry Pratchett

---------------------

"And no practical definition of freedom would be complete without the freedom to take the consequences. Indeed, it is the freedom upon which all the others are based."

-- Lord Vetinari in Going Postal by Terry Pratchett

---------------------

They thought the Library was a dangerous place because of all the magical books, which was true enough, but what made it really one of the most dangerous places there could ever be was the simple fact that it was a library.

-- Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett

---------------------

As a wizard, it was something that Ponder had only before encountered in acorns: a tiny soundless voice which said, yes, I am but a small, green, simple object - but I dream about forests.

-- Interesting Times by Terry Pratchett

---------------------

In the 24th century, there will be no hunger. There will be no greed. And every child will know how to read.

-- Gene Roddenberry, as repeated by Jonathan Frakes in the documentary How William Shatner Changed the World

---------------------

We've got two lives, one we're given and the other one we make
And the world won't stop, and actions speak louder
Listen to your heart, and what your heart might say
Everything we got, we got the hard way.

-- Mary Chapin Carpenter, The Hard Way from the album Come On, Come On

---------------------

Cause when they own the information, oh
They can bend it all they want.

-- John Mayer, Waiting on the World to Change from the album Continuum

---------------------

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, "I'll try again tomorrow."

-- Mary Anne Radmacher, as seen in Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Tales to Inspire

---------------------

I never loved the soldier
Until there was a war.
Or thought about tomorrow
'til my baby hit the floor.
I only talk to God
When somebody's about to die.
I never cherished freedom
Freedom never cries.

-- Five for Fighting, Freedom Never Cries from the album Two Lights

---------------------

It may sound absurd: but don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed: but won't you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream

-- Five for Fighting, Superman (It's Not Easy) from the album American Town

---------------------

Had a dream last night took a time travellin' ride
Back to my childhood where those monsters reside
They snack on innocence and dine on self-esteem
But I like to be in touch with what makes me scream
Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost
These are the things that terrify me the most.
No alien, psychopath or MTV host
Scares me like vampires,mummies and the Holy Ghost.

-- Jimmy Buffett, Vampires, Mummies and the Holy Ghost from the album Fruitcakes

---------------------

"I want to believe that... the dead are not lost to us. That they speak to us... as part of something greater than us - greater than any alien force. And if you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen, to what's speaking, it can give us the power to save ourselves."

-- Fox Mulder, The X-Files from the episode The Truth, pt. 2
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Lilia Ahner